


kisses and card games

by Vamps4Vamps



Category: Lovecraft Country (TV)
Genre: F/F, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-17
Updated: 2020-10-17
Packaged: 2021-03-08 21:47:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27053650
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vamps4Vamps/pseuds/Vamps4Vamps
Summary: "The question wasn't about what I want," Ruby snaps."Yes, needs and wants are two very different things. You're right. You need someone who encourages you to reach your fullest potential - someone who doesn't lie to you or ask you to shrink.""And you give me that?""I believe I do."
Relationships: Christina Braithwhite/Ruby Baptiste, Ruby Baptiste/Christina Braithwhite
Comments: 15
Kudos: 156





	kisses and card games

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by The/And Card game on Youtube wherein couples have to answer a set of intimate questions in order to get to know eachother better. I thought this would be cute.

Ruby didn't want to do this shit, but her and Christina had been caught kissing by some lesbians - all that money spent on a European car and there was still no privacy. It was like being caught butt naked on a hot summer day. It was one thing to be a black woman caught with a white man, but to be one with a woman? She'd been stupid. Naive. Stealing a kiss from her lover when she thought no one was looking - a mistake she wouldn't be making again after this was over and done with.

And to be honest, she didn't even know why she thought it'd be a good idea to do this. They needed privacy if they were to survive. Some childish lesbians who looked at them with awe be damned.

She smooths her skirt underneath her as she takes a seat across from Christina. The blonde was dressed to the nines as always - this time covered in a pair of casual grey slacks and a black button up - a muted canvas to Ruby's bright blue dress. 

"How does this work?" She asks one of the girls, Bridgette had been her name. She's a short girl dressed in men's clothing much like Christina, only hers are a bit less tailored. The slacks a bit too long for her legs and the long-sleeve button up tight around the arms and the pits. Ruby wonders how she stays safe looking like that. The Mark of Cain wasn't exactly easy to come by.

"Well, we got one of these tape recorders and cards here-" She points to the tiny table between Christina and Ruby. "-the game is for you guys to answer the questions on the cards as honestly as you can. No one will know it's you."

"And what is this project again?" 

"A project we've been doing at the gay bar on the South Side. It's about intimacy for women like us - there's not much for us to look to, you know? The straights got all the movies and the music. We figured we need a little something to go off of. Everyone's just been trying to find their own way 'till now."

"So, all we have to do is answer the questions on these cards?"

Bridgette nods. "Yep."

"And then, you'll leave us alone?"

At that, Christina tears her gaze away from Ruby to look up. Her new attention causes Bridgette to falter, stumble on her words. "O-of course."

"And thank you for doing this for us," calls the other, Anna, from the back.

Ruby 'humpfs' - an action that causes the tiniest smile to dance on Christina's lips - and leans back in her chair. 

"This should be fun," Christina jeers.

Ruby rolls her eyes.

Bridgette presses the tape recorder before scurrying off behind the curtain. Her squeaked, 'you can begin', not going unnoticed. Ruby is the first to pull one of the cards. The paper is scratchy under her fingers, the cards are a concoction much like Dee's comics - well-done, but lacking the material that professionalism granted you. She admires briefly how they're all cut exactly the same size, how the letters are written in such a pretty black font you would've thought they printed it. The girls put care into this.

She squints her eyes. Cute. The kids were just cute.

"When do you feel closest to me?" She asks slowly, placing the card face down back on the table.

A warmth, a teasing grace, dances into Christina's eyes. "Do you want me to be honest?"

"Have I ever asked you otherwise?"

She nods, less as an answer to Ruby's question and more as an acknowledgement of Ruby being right. She'd never asked otherwise for as long as Christina had known her.

"When you look at me," she answers.

"That's it."

Again, Christina nods. "When you look at me, as I am right now, and trust the words that I say, I feel closest to you." She swallows whatever unfinished sentence she decided not to speak. Her next words are a whisper. "What about you?"

Ruby hated to admit it but she was curious. Curious to see what else was in the deck. Curious to see what her lover would answer. 

"You know that Sunday morning when you just got back from New York and you'd brought me a gift?"

The gift in question had been a new spell for Ruby - a spell that as Christina, William at the time, said weaved more of that magic into Ruby's voice that she seemed to naturally carry, made her a modern day siren. 

Christina peers at her with her bright eyes. The corners of her lips upticked in a soft smile. "Yes."

"I didn't ask you for that gift." And just like that, the smile drops. Ruby shakes her head. Her girl was such a moody thing. "But, you knew what I wanted. You paid attention to what I needed. What my words weren't saying. That's more than anyone's ever done for me."

Christina stares at her for a moment longer, but doesn't respond. Instead, she leans forward and picks up a card. She huffs a laugh - her tongue darting out to lick the corner of her lip.

"What was your biggest concern about introducing me to your family?"

Ruby fixes her with a gaze. "Now you sure as hell already know the answer to that."

She puts the card face down and picks up another, a different one. This time her reaction is one of tightly knit brows and a deep sigh.

"What do you think I need most from you and are you providing it?"

"Oh ya'll are really hitting the hard questions," Ruby mumbles. Christina laughs though Ruby can tell from the shaking of her leg that she's nervous. The question having unsettled her for whatever reason.

It was a question to think about. Their relationship was one of equals - Christina never lied to her or invalidated her. Together they pushed each other to reach newer heights, test the limits of their powers. But to ask her: what she _needed_? Ruby didn't know if that was a question she could answer. At one point, Christina thought she needed immortality. At one point, Ruby thought Christina was just some rich white girl who needed power.

"You need to be challenged," Ruby says finally, locking eyes with her lover. She smiles. Her eyes spark and Christina smirks. "Left unchecked god only knows what you'd do."

"Like the truck driver?"

"Exactly like the truck driver."

Christina laughs. Her tongue darts out to touch the corner of her lipstick. Her eyes flicker to the ground and back up to Ruby. _Bedroom eyes_. Fuck what Atticus and Leti said, Christina always wore her heart on her sleeve. If Ruby wasn't careful she'd slip up and drown just like she had done in that car.

She clears her throat. "Your turn."

"I don't think that's how the game works," Christina replies with a soft hint of snark. Ruby cocks an eyebrow. Christina averts her gaze to the ground, uncrosses her legs, and plants her hands on her thighs. There's a moment's pause before she looks up and speaks. The soft smirk on Christina's face tells Ruby enough - Christina's about to say something she doesn't want to hear. "I would say you want someone who understands your racial issues - the struggle of being interrupted as a black women and as we both know, I can't give you that."

"The question wasn't about what I want," Ruby snaps.

"Yes, needs and wants are two very different things. You're right. You need someone who encourages you to reach your fullest potential - someone who doesn't lie to you or ask you to shrink."

"And you give me that?"

"I believe I do."

"Hm." Ruby picks up the next card. She shakes her head. "What's one thing you want from me that you've never told me?" 

Christina blinks. In a brief flash, she can see her lover's mind running a mile a minute, searching for the words that would be the right amount of honest, the right amount of _not_ stepping on Ruby's toes.

Her words are a slow moving car crash. 

"I want you to want to be around me as much as I want to be around you," she says softly.

"I love being around you," Ruby whispers urgently, leaning forward in her chair, because what else is she supposed to say? If not for the table, she'd be gripping Christina's knee. Kissing her. Telling her with her body what had been lacking with words.

Christina shakes her head. "It's not the same." Before Ruby can respond she picks up another piece of paper from the deck. "Did they say how long we have to do this for?"

"Only two more cards!" Someone quips from beyond the curtain.

"Christina-"

"What does loving me feel like?" She holds up the card with two fingers so, Ruby can read the font. 

These kids must be magic. She leans back in her chair. 

Her and Christina, talked, sure - they talked often, staying up late in their bedroom exchanging quips and banter about whatever topic caught their fancy for the day- but not like this. 

"There was a time when I was a kid when my mama forgot me at some man's house," she begins. It'd be too much to look at Christina so, instead she focuses on her hands. One thumb is crooked inside her palm. A nervous gesture. A gesture she only did when she was on the edge of her seat. "I was ten and I was scared. I remember I spent that night hiding in whatever nook or cranny I could scoot into so the man couldn't find me. And in every damn place I slipped into, there was a butterfly. Beautiful black butterflies with eyes on their wings. I don't know how or why - butterflies don't exactly live in apartments on the south side, but they were there. Until the man left, I focused on those butterflies, following them wherever they went, because they led me to safety. Kept me protected and hidden."

She breathes deeply, not bothering to wipe the tears from her eyes. Christina tentatively reaches towards her. Those long arms stretching across the table and those hands finding hers in a warm grip.

"Everything that I look at and I'm like 'wow' - that's how I love you. Every curiosity, every wonder I have - it all leads back to you," Ruby looks into Christina's eyes. "Loving you is like following one of those butterflies."

By the purse of her lips, Ruby knows Christina is holding back her tears. Even like this, she doesn't break away from Ruby's gaze. 

"You already know that seeing you singing was magic for me, but loving you-" She looks down, searching for words, shaking her head. "I love you so deeply that I can't even quantify it. No language can describe how I feel for you. Not Adam. Not English."

Ruby squints her eyes. Her tone playful. "Try."

Christina's mouth stretches in a frozen grin. She should've expected that. 

"Loving you feels like an eternity of firsts," she says finally. The words sound right. True. 

She hears one of the girls whisper, "Oh, that's beautiful," from behind the curtain. 

At first, Christina hadn't wanted to do this. She thought it'd be much simpler to spell away the girls' memories, but Ruby had convinced her not to. She had convinced Christina to come.

_"I don't want to do it either, but you saw the way they looked at us," she had said. "We're probably the first queer folk-"_

_"I don't like that word."_

_Ruby eyed her. Christina reminded herself to bite her tongue. Neither one of them liked being interrupted. "Fine. We're the first women like us they'd ever seen. The least we can do is do them a little favor."_

Funny how as soon as they got in the car to drive to this little studio the roles had been switched. Christina had been the one interested and Ruby the one annoyed at the entire prospect. Probably had something to do with Christina trying to kiss her in the car - the exact same thing that had got them in these chairs in the first place.

They have one more question to go. Even still, the two can't pull away from each other's gaze.

Ruby is the first to clear her throat and pull away. She grabs the last card left, flips it down so they both can read it.

"If this were the last time we were to speak, what would you say to me?" Ruby asks.

"Don't let anyone make you feel small," Christina replies without pause. She stares at Ruby, her gaze filling in an unspoken question.

"What?" Ruby asks. "You want me to answer?"

"I'd like that. Yes," Christina replies carefully. 

Ruby makes a soft sound of contemplation in her throat. 

"Stop killing people," she quips. Christina makes a move to lean back, but Ruby grabs her hands in hers and holds her there. "I'm joking. I would tell you to never stop looking for firsts."

At that moment, Ruby lets Christina kiss her. It's a slow wet kiss - Christina's bottom lip trembles as they touch and she mutters a few words Ruby cannot hear in between pecks of their lips. Like this, Ruby feels as if it's just them in this room. Always has been them and always will be. An eternity of firsts and butterflies with her devil of a lover. 

When they pull apart, the two girls are there standing, shifting from one foot to the other. 

"We didn't want to interrupt," Anna says quickly. "But we have to... um... turn off the tape recorder."

"That was really cool," Bridgette nods. "Like wow."

Christina pulls away, her hand still in Ruby's, and makes move to stand. Ruby follows. Her expression reverting back to an icy gaze, a mask, like she would wear when Ruby first met her. Her not William. 

"Did you get what you needed?" She asks slowly.

The girls nod. 

Hand in hand, Ruby and Christina walk to that same old European car. Christina opens the passenger side for her lover and slides in next to her once Ruby is safe and secure in her seat.

This time Ruby kisses Christina and this time, she doesn't care who sees.


End file.
